The Not-So-"Hapless" D-Rays

Stephen King makes me laugh in the book "Faithful." He has all these funny quirks and sayings and calls the Devil Rays, the "hapless" Devil Rays. So I can't help but think of that everytime we play them. And everytime, you'd think we were playing the Yankees in the ALCS. They and Toronto are just-- well, it's like the Sox need to watch more film, you know? I saw two of the three games, and it was a struggle. I hate watching them lose to the Rays. It's like watching the Patriots lose to the Dolphins in 2004 - stupid. Sorry, Dolphins. (I'm not a total Miami-team-hater, really.) But there were a million and four Sox fans at the game and you could hear them chanting. That's kinda sad for the Rays.

So, no word on Clemens. But, according to the Globe, seems like your Jeter talks to him "a lot." And you guys are still watching this carefully. And you, my Dear Criss, get with the schedule! The only team you're playing this month is MY team. Seriously, there are three series. Check the calendar.

Roxy

Stephen Reed's cart at Faneuil Hall: Boston.com Staff Photo, Gary Dzen

Concerns

Why is it that I don't know these things, Dear Roxy? So it's happening... the Yankees and the Red Sox. Round one of many. And the battle continues.

Any word on Clemens? I heard his son broke a finger and won't be able to pitch for Texas in a while. Maybe Roger can be his replacement... You know? Since he has no one to play for right now.

And how about that Ricky Williams. One more failed drug test. What else is new?

Oh, the Heat. Could you stop hating on the Miami teams? Give the Heat a break, my friend. Who knows... maybe they'll break through this year. Maybe.

I'm going to another concert soon.... Yes, another one. The fourth one this year! And it's not Rascal Flatts either!

-Criss

AP Photo: Frank Franklin II

Count Down

Count it down, Dear Criss. They’ve already begun running the clips of Varitek picking up AFraud like Santa flips his satchel over his back. Next week, my friend, begins the poetic torture for both of us. But best of all, is Johnny Trader making a cameo at Fenway. Oh yes.
So, I’m not going to complain about the Wakefield situation without Mirabelli, etc. Instead I will make mention of Curty’s excellent four wins. Not too shabby. I think overall, things are moving along well, but, really, you should at least try to win against the Indians. Try. And, did I see Varitek groing a beard? (Not in this pic.)

As for the Heat, I predict they’ll win this series then go on to lose. Got to keep the tradition rolling. You’re right, though. I’m not caring. Hee hee.

Roxy

AP Photo, Winslow Townson

Back In It

So, I watched two out of the three Yankee games this weekend, Dear Roxy. Which means only one thing: I'm back in baseball business. And Jeter was soooo great during both games. He's simply phenomenal. And since the Yankees won both games, it means I have to watch the rest of their games so they can go on the longest win streak in baseball. And if I can't watch them all, then hopefully the Yankees will only play day games. They're 9-0 on day games, while 1-8 on night games. Ouch!

So, Roger, huh? Don't care much about the guy anymore, but I also don't want you guys getting him. Lets see how it all plays out.

Basketball playoffs are on! Not that you care, but I do... just a bit. The Heat are in it so I have to root for them. After all, we all frequent the same "hot" spots. lol. I have to root for my posse!

So, where's Steve and SportingGuys? We can debate whose blog is better. I think we have the upper hand.

-Criss

Blog Hog Moment: Roger Ramirez

Okay, Dear Criss, it's down to your people and mine. So Boston Dirt Dogs is reporting that the Sox may now be at the top of Clemens' list, with the Yankees 2nd. This really is becoming like the Manny drama. Okay, I'm not saying anything else about this until he finally makes a decision. I'm not feeling the love, but at the same time, I don't want you to get him. =)

Roxy

Lookin' Good

So Happy Late Patriots Day. I miss that so much. Things are closed, the marathon's going on, the streets are crowed, the T's impossible, the Sox are playing (although it was usually the Yankees)... Ahhhh.

I swear, Dear Criss, that really happened! The guy was wearing a Yankee-Damon jersey and everyone freaked and he was being cocky and walking back and forth. Someone threw a drink at him and security came over. Everyone booed him as he walked about like a Yankee peacock. I didn’t tell you, b/c now that I rememberrrrrr, sooooomeone was supposed to call me back that day and forgot. Ahem.

Okay, Steve is too much. “SportingGuys”?! I love it. Don’t let anyone steal it. You can be our Brother Blog. Seriously, he’s starting to have his own column in our comments section. Ha ha!

I’m feeling the baseball excitement and YES, we play the Marlins, but shhh, ’cause I haven’t bought those tickets yet. (Don't sell out, please.) I will in the next week, so start thinking about whether or not you want to come. I’m going to two. The Sox are SMOKIN’, as an old Boston song goes. Of course, Wakey is pitching right now and things are not going well, but man! I’ll tell you, this new gang is a good blend (Wily Mo hasn’t won me over.) And YOUK!!!!!! He is just smackin’ those homeruns and his OBP must be like 42 gazillion. I clearly can’t measure OBP, but I know his is high, okay?

Sorry I’ve been absent this week. It’s been a bit busy. AND I had Le Jury Duty. Oh my gosh!

And Curty!!! You’re doing fantastical! Loretta!!! I can’t get the Beatles’ “Get Back” out of my head! I really underestimated Theo’s decisions. Again.

Roxy

Youk & Papi Photo: Jim Davis, Boston Globe
Marathon: AP Photo on Globe Site

It's a Crazy World

Wow!!!! I didn't know I was gonna cause such an uproar between your friends, Dear Roxy. Whoo-hoo! Now I know what makes your friends tick. lol. Maybe we should have all of them showcased on our blog. Maybe we won't get any complains then...

And I don't believe any of your Johnny story. If that was true, I don't think you would've forgotten to mention it earlier.

Have you gotten into baseball? I'm not all there yet... It takes a while, I suppose. At least for me. I just can't wait till the Mighty Yankees get in a better groove.

Are the Red Sox playing the Marlins in interleague play?

Running out of things to say...
-Criss

Easter Wishes

Happy Easter!

Criss & Roxy

Move Over Wells, Here Comes Beckett

"Varitek added, 'Some people don't let it out. Some people let it out. He's one that lets it out.'" Varitek on Beckett. 4/12/06 Boston Globe

Okay, Dear Criss, this picture expresses my face when I saw a certain someone who has NEVER BEEN ON SPORTING GALS - even by mistake - pictured on OUR BLOG (Actually, it's really meant to showcase JB)! Um, typically, the only Steve is Steve Young on here! Wow! Now I've got pseudo-angry friends who want to be featured, too! I mean I'm all about the non-49er Steve, but he better show some love (cough: hint-hint, Steve) on here before he gets primo feature articles again-and from YOU!! ;) (Postscript, I heard a beep-beep from my phone as I wrote this original message. When I finished, it was a text message from Steve. Apparently, he has clicked on this site before. Oopsies. It's all good, Steve.)

So, back to SPORTS (excluding the barbarian boxing). David Wells needs to go retire or move to a far away country to find Zen, because that was so depressing. My first broadcast game of the season down here, and after a pretty good Sox run, and he comes in to turn this smile upside down. Thanks. Bring back Arroyo in that case. Is that factoid about his homeruns true?! That was funny.

Man, it was good when you slacked off on here a little bit, I didn't have to see those big pictures of your posers. And hear about your "hero." Blech.

Oh! I forgot to tell you, at the Ft. Lauderdale Spring Training game, this IDIOT was wearing a Johnny Trader Yankees jersey and was walking around the stadium like a big shot and everyone started booing. Then he kept on showboating (really) and people started throwing stuff at him. Security came in. JTrader's debut at Fenway should be reeeaaal interesting.

Roxy

AP Photo

Blog Hog Moment: Steve

Good luck on your boxing match, Steve! We hope you kick some a**!

- Criss & Roxy

Deal with It!

Well, you’re gonna have to read my stories on the Yankees, just as much as I have to read yours, so deal with it, Dear Roxy! I will not take anymore more abuse from you and the Red Sox nation. I refuse!

And speaking of which, I bet Luke had a real problem speaking those words about Damon, the Yankees and Steinbrenner at tonight’s episode of GG. He must’ve had a heart attack when he first read the lines. I heard they had to do about 20 different takes until he got it right.

AND, while still on the subject, how about them Damon, the Yankees and DEREK JETER? Whoo-hoo, the tradition continues… Nine straight wins on home opener day. And, how about that go ahead home-run by the hometown hero? Need not say more ;)

I guess Bronson Arroyo is having a "blast" in Cincy. He sure needed a change. That’s the second straight time he homers in his first two starts. And listen to this: Those are his first two homers in six years!

You know who else homered earlier this week? Mark Mulder. He’s hot!

What else is happening? Anything interesting in your end?

- Criss

Photo: NY Post

Blog Hog Moment: #33 is 34

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, VARITEK!

''I think the thing that he has that people don't see on the other side is he keeps the team loose," said Bard. ''He's a funny guy."* Boston Globe 4/11/06

(*Um, I'm working on seeing that side, but sure! Happy Birthday! -Roxy)

Improper Bostonian Photo &
AP Photo/Gail Burton; YahooSports.com

Show 'Em That Smile, Papi

WE LOVE BIG PAPI!!!

Listen, Ortiz is The Man in my book after I read this, Dear Criss:

"I want to finish my career as a Red Sox player," Ortiz said. "I'm going to be around for a while. I'm pretty sure New England is going to take this as good news." (Howard Ulman, AP)

Who could ask for more? Oh, sure, here:

"I feel this is my house and I've got to protect this house."

Papi, you are safe 'til 2010 with an option for 2011. At which point, you better retire wearing that Red Sox uniform. Ulman goes on to write (poetry, Mr. Ulman), "Ortiz says he embraces the intensity in baseball-crazed Boston. 'If you don't want to be famous, just step away,' he said."

I can think of a few people who need to re-read that 10 times.

WE LOVE BIG PAPI!!!

Roxy

P.S. Not caring about Yankee Stadium. Shows their character to abandon it.

P.P.S Yeah, Rory - I'm not cool with what's going to happen. I totally disagree. Leave Jess out of this. I'm so sick of going back to Jess. It's bad enough she went back to Logan. She's setting the women's movement back by 10 years! I'm embarrassed.

P.P.P.S WE LOVE BIG PAPI!!!!

Boston Globe Staff Photo, Bill Greene

Roger who?

You can keep I-can't-make-up-my-mind-about-retirement, Dear Roxy. We don't want him anymore. I mean, the guy is good. At his age, he's still better than half of the pitchers out there, but we don't beg! OK, maybe just enough to make him come back...

Yes, Wade was there too. And so was Haslem. I think there were two more, but I didn't recognize them. Maybe they were bodyguards because one of them kept getting in between the players and the crazy fans, ie. not me!

OK, so my Yankees are 1-2. No worries, we are just warming up.... It's too early! We still think we're playing in the WBC or spring training or something. We'll come around.

So your guys won, Griffey passed Mantle on the homerun list. Not a good day for Yankee fans. We did, however, get a green light to continue with the $800 million dollar stadium. I'm not sure how I feel about that yet. I love Yankee stadium, even though I've only been there once, it was an awesome experience.

-Criss

PS. Totally not sports related, but what's up with GG? Now they're gonna make Rory a cheater?!?!?! Make them stop the nonsense!

Let the 10,000-Game Season Begin!

Roger? Is there something you want to tell us as you sit at the Sox game and meet with our management?

It does feel amazing and exciting and fantastic, right, Dear Criss? The season starting and all... You won't believe this, but I got the day confused and didn't realize my guys played until Mon. night. I felt like an idiot telling the crazy Yankees security guard at work. And turns out Papi did magnificently. He hit that ball so high, I swear they said 400 feet. I mean, I can naturally hit that high. Yeah right! Did you see Coco's catch?! Wow! And great job, Curty.

So we won game 1 (and so did you, whatever), but we have a problem with Wakey - NOBODY BUT MIRABELLI CAN CATCH HIM! Hello? Somebody beg Belli to come back.

Um, stop chasing Shaq around, man. That's embarrassing. ;) That's pretty cool. Now you're hanging out with NBA stars. Was Wade there?

Still can't root for UF. Go UM.

Roxy

AP Photo, LM Otero, YahooSports.com (Clemens)
Boston Globe Staff Photo, Matthew J. Lee (Coco)

It's All Good Now

You finally got the pics up, Dear Roxy! Your Big Papi photos remind me of my Mark Mulder photos. I must have twenty different shots of the guy in every angle possible. The only difference is Matt is hot!!!

Hooray, baseball has arrived!!!! I was so excited about the whole thing yesterday, I forgot the Yankees game was on ESPN2. Needless to say, I missed the 15-2 win.

Congrats to the Gators!!! OK, so I'm not a Gators fan, and I didn't watch the end of the game, but I guess it's nice to see some fellow Floridians win it all.

Ooooh, I forgot to tell you about my "encounter" with some of the Miami Heat players! Last weekend, a few friends and I went to Wet Willies at the Grove. We were sitting, having a few drinks, when a group of big, tall, elegant men and their wives walked passed us. One of the men was wearing a top hat. That man was no other than Shaq! It was sooo funny. All of a sudden you see this group of guys and girls following them saying, "Oh my God, it's Shaq. Oh my God, it's Shaq!!! Shaqqqqq, Shaqqqq, Shaqqqq!!!!" Hilarious! They were nice enough to wave and say hi as they walked on by... They went in to the Improv.

And no, I was not one of the people running behind them...

Just clarifying,

- Criss

Beautiful Days at the Parks

Finally I get some pics up here, Dear Criss. The teenie-tiny people are Manny (Ft. Myers) and Millar (Ft. Lauderdale). Big Papi's a BIG MAN! Scary! Here he is from every possible angle.

And what's the latest deal on Manny? According to Boston Dirt Dogs, he wants to retire for a year, chill in Brazil and come back to work for Baseball Tonight?! I think he's gonna retire to get away from the Sox then come back so he can play for another team. You catch my drift?

Special thanks to my bro for the great pics and for acting as designated photog for two games!

Roxy