HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday Dear Rox
Happy birthday to you!!!

-Criss

You're are soooo much older than me... I kind of feel bad for you ;)

SPORTING GALS YEAR-END BONANZA SPORTS WRAP-UP!

Welcome to the 1st annual SPORTING GALS YEAR-END BONANZA SPORTS WRAP-UP! It's not easy doing this nonsense from your memory at the end of the year. All year-round we've thought of ideas for this, but of course, we don't remember now. So here's our best attempt to represent the best - according to us. =)

* * * * * * *
FOOTBALL!!
Criss:
-Dan Marino: Now in the Hall of Fame, Dan gave his best to the Miami Dolphins and South Florida. Although he never won a Super Bowl, he is very deserving of every accolade he gets. Congrats!

-The Colts: What can I say about the Mighty Colts? For starters, a great
season deserving a championship! Although they are going through a rough time right now, they are amazing team with a great coach, and big hearts, and it shows now more than ever. And Peyton, can we say MVP?

AP Photo, Phil Coale

-The Dolphins: No playoffs this year, just like the last few years, BUT they’ve been playing great as of late; five in a row and counting…. Maybe it’s a sign of things to come…

-NY Teams: No Jets and no Bills… Oh, but then there’s Peyton’s little brother… I’ll be rooting for Eli and the Giants, unless you play your brother, that is.

-Terrell Owens: Here is my one and only opinion about the matter - SUSPEND HIM FROM THE LEAGUE…

* * * * * * *
Roxy:
-Steve Young: Hall of Fame, people. This guy is class. Defines the word. After years of tormenting my family and friends with never-ending games and personal commentary (Dear Criss, you missed out on most of these years with me), the man gets inducted into the Hall of Fame. I should've been there. I'm a fool. But I remember that Monday night game with him here against Miami. Imagine how I felt when he got injured a few weeks before that, and I wasn't gonna see him play! I saw him throw on the sidelines, and I did see this next man make some touchdowns!
Photo: Kurt Rogers, SF Chronicle

-Jerry Rice: Okay, class part 2. We love Jerry. Loved watching him play wih excellence. No comparison, past, present or future. And his discipline... Did anyone ever see that interview about his pre-season/off-season regimen on The Hill? Happy Retirement.

-Tedy Bruschi: What a great comeback. That's determination. I think even non-Pats fans were shocked at what happened to him. It was terrific to see him play again that Monday night.

AP Photo: Robert E. Klein, YahooSports.com

-Pats vs. Dolphins: Last year, I thought they had this one in the bag and because my brother's friend was weeping from the impending Dolphins loss, we left early! We heard the crowd go crazy as we walked to the parking lot. Then, with the game on the radio (and I was in Mr. Dolphins' car to endure this part), the Dolphins come back to beat the Pats. So, it was a looong ride home, my friends. After a shaky game this year, the Pats pulled this one off as I screamed, "I didn't come here to see you lose again." It's cool seeing Brady, Bruschi, Vrabel, Vinatieri, and the gang live. Apparently, so cool, I might get a little too loud, forcing my NY friend at this game to tell me to simmer down with hand motions. (His side: He said he was scared b/c we had a lot of Dolfans around us.) Brady kept so composed the whole time, walking around as if he were at his sister's B-B-Q.

-Adam Vinatieri: Just b/c I like him 'cause he's so good.

AP Photo: Keith Srakocic; YahooSports.com

-Tom Brady: SI Sportsman of the Year and the 60 Minutes interview. I knew he was a nice guy, but I didn't know how nice until these two interviews. Oh my gosh, I almost forgot the Super Bowl!

-Ben Roethlisberger: Exciting. I think with some polish, he's gonna go places.

* * * * * * *
BASEBALL!!
Roxy:
-Red Sox: I'm certainly not in the mood to talk about this, but okay. Be positive.

-Varitek: His first Grand Slam. Wow, that seems funny doesn't it? But true.

-Queer Eye: How funny was that? I know Dear Criss loooves the part where they wax Varitek's back!

Photos: Boston Globe, Boston.com




-Millar: "What in the world, junior?!" I love the picture with him in Brady's uni. I loved watching (on Carson Daly's show) the video of him singing "Born in the U.S.A." thrusting his fist in the air when he was a young chap in college. Believe it or not, I'm the only Sox fan who hasn't seen that. Millar will always be my co-favorite player (with Varitek). Cowboy Up, buddy.

Photo: Boston Globe, Boston.com





-Gabe Kaplar: Coming back from Japan!

Photo: Boston Globe, Boston.com

-Spring Training: Watching the Sox in Ft. Lauderdale while Criss STUDIED next to me! Priceless. Thanks for letting me use your camera.

-Beating the Yankees in the ALDS. Skip the next part of the drama.** [**Okay, okay, after Criss enlightened me, I realized that I'm an idiot living in a dream world b/c that was just a regular end-of-season series this year. Oops. And last year was the ALCS, followed by THE WORLD SERIES!! Excuse me. I still stand behind the joy of beating the Yankees at the end of this season.]

-The ring ceremony on opening day at Fenway. Awww. What a lovely day.

* * * * * * *
Criss:
-The Yankees: Rox, the Yankees-Red Sox ALDS thing was in 2004! Please let it go, for your own benefit… But I believe the series you are talking is the last series of the season, when the Yankess celebrated their eighth straight AL East title on your field... Enough about that, during the offseason, something magnificent did happen: the acquisition of your bearded center-fielder, Damon. Do you remember? I think you’re still crying about that one. But we can’t forget about BERNIE and Matsui renewing their contracts! YAY! 2006 here we come!

-Derek Jeter: Just because he’s my favorite…

Reuters Photo: Ray Stubblebine

-World Series: Congrats to the White Sox and their world series championship.

-Spring Training: Let me tell you about my career-changing spring training game. First of all, I have to go with Rox to a Sox game, but she can't go with me to a Yanks game (I put up with a lot). Then, I have to ask for the day off from work (boss not real happy). At the game, I have to study for my PR class test (not doing a very good job). Get to school with minutes to spare, go to the bathroom to freshen up (because sitting under the hot scorching South Florida sun is not exactly a nice and clean experience). Get to class, look at the test and wonder where's the stuff I studied during the game (none of it there). So you see, I don't recall doing very well in that class, which makes me think about my Advertising degree. And what do I do the following semester? But of course, change my degree to Psychology!!! After all of this, the one who's gonna need a shrink is me!

**********
Roxy's Commentary on Criss' Nonsense: Well, you see how the Red Sox game guided you in the right direction? It was like you had an epiphany. You don't just get that with the Yankees. And you bet I'm not going with you to a Yankees game. That's just wrong. (Thanks for being an understanding friend.)

* * * * * * *
BASKETBALL:
Criss:
-What, the Knicks won?: Well, as you all know, I’m a NY fan, and the Knicks are not exactly the best. What happened? We have a great coach and some good players. I thought that was enough to make us contenders… Well, there’s always next year.

-The Heat is On: Yes, I copied that from them, but it's true. They'll be contenders and I suppose I'll root for them, or else Darryl Hall and John Oates will kill me...

-Dwayne Wade: Best selling jersey in the entire league!

AP Photo: Lynne Sladky

* * * * * * *
Roxy: Zzzz. No Stockton to Malone (the Jazz version of Malone), Jeff Hornacek, Greg Ostertag and friends, no basketball.

* * * * * * *
Hockey:
Criss: Zzzz... Unless the team from "Miracle" plays!!!! Go OC!!!

Promotion Photo, Yahoo!
* * * * * * *
Roxy: Best 2005 DVD release: "Miracle."

* * * * * * *


Hope you enjoyed our 2005 analysis!
-Criss & Roxy

Stuffed

I'm pretty much done with eating, Dear Rox. I really, truly believe I've gained 20lbs over the weekend...
I hope you had a wonderful Christmas.. I had a great time, too. Santa gave me all I wanted and more :) The best thing was that all of our family got together during "Noche Buena" (Christmas Eve for all of you who don't speak Spanish) and had a wonderful time. And I also went to the movies this weekend. I definitely caught up on movies. I watch three: Memoirs of a Geisha, King Kong, and The Family Stone. All very good, I might add.

OK, Sports: I watch the Heat game Christmas Day. Good thing they won... I wouldn't have heard the end from Darryl and Johnny Oates otherwise. The Dolphins won, too; unbelievable. Too bad there's no playoff picture for them... And so sorry The Colts lost; there's always next weekend. And I can't forget about the Jets losing to none other than the Pats! Ouch!
How can I forget about Johnny Damon; the New Yankee? He officially became a Yankee Friday after passing his physical... And can I just say his wife still annoys me...

- Criss

A Special Message from Sporting Gals

Merry Christmas from Sporting Gals!

-Criss & Roxy

AP Photo, Charles Krupa; YahooSports.com

Postscript: Johnny Traitor

Okay, this is gonna be quick because I'm annoyed and tired and it's Christmas, for the love of everything good. I just wanna say that Boston Globe's Dan Shaughnessy hit my feelings right on the nose with his column today on Johnny Mean-O. "...His production in pinstripes will be a personal affront to Red Sox fans around the world," he said, later noting the whole "we" thing all of a sudden with the Yankees that I think you mentioned before, Dear Criss. And he also wondered if this would've happened with Theo. But then Globe columnist Bob Ryan says us Sox fans should really give Johnny a standing-O when he comes to Fenway. Oh my goodness, did he really say that?

Let's stick with Shaughnessy this time, kids. And this is the last time I talk about this Damon matter!


-Roxy

P.S. Your Flaherty better be able to catch Wakey.

blah blah blah blah blah

This is what Damon had to say yesterday, Dear Rox, "It's going to be different, an adjustment. I know back in May I said I would never play here - but that's when I was with the Red Sox, so of course I'm going to think that way. "
Good PR move, Damon!

Enough of that Damon guy, Bernie is coming back!!! One more year, one more season for the ages... gotta love it!

Did you hear about the Bengals receiver Chad Johnson? He hit a deer, took it home, so now he's gonna take the deer to the game Sunday AND if he scores a touchdown, he'll do some sort of celebration with the deer. Let's just hope he keeps the celebration G-rated.

I just read the news about Tony Dungy's son. My condolences to the Dungy family in this difficult time.

Alright, girl. Since you are now on vacation, you can ponder about the rest of the Red Socks offseason while I celebrate the Yankees new signings!

- Criss

Photo credit: Photo illustration: Peter LaVigna/N.Y. Post; AP photo

Johnny Traitor

Wow, thanks a lot, Johnny.

You know what this is like, Dear Criss? It's like if the girl you couldn't stand in your statistics class because she sweet talks the professor for an extension--well, it's like she got the extension and you stayed up all night working on your project! And then she steals your boyfriend. Okay, I'm not making total sense, but you get what I mean. I mean this is treason. This is a slap in the face followed by the gatorade bucket poured over you in 20 below weather - and not in a celebratory way! And how did I find out this nasty truth? From the Yankee-loving security officer at work. That's just not cool. He's been wrong before, so I thought, maaaaybe, just maaaybe he would be again. The Sox are idiots to let him go, but go, Johnny. It shows how much you loved Boston. Can't waaaait to play the Yankees at Fenway. I read your quote from the old traitor. I know what you mean. Don't go saying that kind of stuff and then slap us Red Sox fans in the face, mister.

We'll live without him, but on days like this, I wish Theo was around in full capacity to prevent such madness. THEO!!!!

They better pick up some real talent to make up for this.

-Roxy


AP Photo, Winslow Townson; YahooSports.com

Eat your words, Damon

Dear Rox,
Until he doesn't start producing for the Yankees, I won't be content... This is what Damon said last May...
"There's no way I can go play for the Yankees, but I know they're going to come after me hard," he told MLB.com then. "It's definitely not the most important thing to go out there for the top dollar, which the Yankees are going to offer me. It's not what I need."
What do you have to say now, Damon? Now you have 52 million reasons to play for the Yanks!
Criss

Photo credit: ESPN.com

The good and bad

Miss Rox, let me just start by telling you the type of text message that woke me up at 11:43 last night, "Johnny Damon in a Yankees uniform, sounds great." And I couldn't believe it. After all the trash talk I've given the guy, now he's a part of the best team in baseball. I guess I have to accept it. Now picture this: clean shaven, clean cut, short haircut, AND no more of that ape look.... sounds good to me... Now, if he could only throw the ball?
And this morning, a hate text message by you, "Jerk, you got DAMON." (You can all see what I have to put up with) But I must admit, it felt good. Now, if he could only throw?
So, my friend, what's going to happen with your loved Red Sucks? Where's Millar heading?

Enough of my trash talk. I didn't get to watch any of the football games this weekend, but I was shocked when I heard The Colts lost. It's okay, though, I'm sure they'll be hungrier now... Regarding the Dolphins, I guess you're right. We don't have a lot of history down here. Maybe a few Marlins and UM victories, but that's pretty much it. And great throw by Brady. It shows why he's one of the best at his job.

OK, Rox, so wake up now, go to work, and pretend that you didn't hear what happened to Damon and the Red Socks, and how the Yankees got them... It's okay, he's not that great anyway. Now, if he could only throw?

Criss

Photo: Illustration, ESPN.com

Playing Blindfolded...and Winning

Can I start by saying, Dear Criss, that it took me a minute to figure out what you were saying with "R-E-G-R-E-B-S-I-L-H-T-E-O-R"? Ha! You're hysterical! Did you see Benny running-in his own touchdown and throwing his body to get it? That was kinda funny (and scary).

Okay, so now Nomar can hang out with his old buddies over yonder with the Dodgers. At least that gives me peace of mind. Phew. But what's with the harsh words? "Wash-out?" Sheesh. Why don't you ask your buddy A-Fraud what's so wrong with playing in the WBC? I mean even Mr. Diversity Varitek (said with love, J-Var, I promise.) offered to play.

I watched most of that Dolphins game and believe it or not, I said they'd win by three and they won by four. Let's start guessing scores! =) But just the major games of interest for the week. I couldn't believe it when they were cutting in with the Colts scores. It was unbelievable what was happening with your Manning boy. Can I admit something? I know I'm not really a Dolphins fan, but I think it's kinda cool that Miami holds the record for a perfect season, so I was kinda happy that wasn't lost. I mean what else does this town have that's sports historic?

And I watched that Pats game. Did you SEEEEEE the pass where Brady was throwing and the dude grabbed his face mask to try and sack him, and without being able to see, Brady passes and connects?! I mean, it's beyond human. Let's be completely honest.

Okay, so how many words can you make from "Roesthlisberger," smart aleck? ;)

-Roxy


AP Photo, WinslowTownson; YahooSports.com

Oh, wow

So many things happened while I was gone, Dear Rox. Well, for starters, we didn't get Nomar, but I don't care about it so much, after all, he is a Sox wash-out.
And no more Mueller for you? Sorry to hear that. And the saga continues... Any new news on Manny? And you do have a Nomar shirt! jk
I heard Arod will not play in the WBC. I guess he'll join Posada.
Oh Peyton.... No longer the undefeated season we wanted (All I hear are Dolphin fans sigh of relief) but that's okay, you're still great.
The Dolphins are now a .500 team. Their chances on making it to the postseason are miniscule, but are still there.
Congrats to Brady, I do like him, too.

Oh, and R-E-G-R-E-B-S-I-L-H-T-E-O-R. Beat that!

But Billy!

Okay, Dear Criss, I had to write in. I had to! No more Bill Mueller. No more Billy Mueller? Officially? How sad. Sox fans, let's all cry with our pillows over our heads for a second to muffle the pain- and then we'll take a deep breath and wipe the tears to watch the rest of the off-season circus unfold. What a respectable, hard working, diligent player. I'm gonna miss him. Please don't take Youk. Mike Lowell, you better make me suuuuuper proud!

-Roxy.


AP Photo, Robert F. Bukaty; YahooSports.com

I'll Tell You What

Look, Dear Criss, I admit, I don't have a Nomar T-shirt or anything (my sister does), but I suuuure hope you in no way possible get Nomar. I mean, if Nomar goes THERE, that's like Theo going to NY. Or your Marino going to Buffalo or Joe Montana playing for the Cowboys. I mean, come on. Of course, you're not even around to read this, instead you're sitting around with a smug look watchig that RIDICULOUS show, basking in the Nomar possibilities. Forget it.

End.

And lay off of Millar!

End.

And, yes, in watching out of curiosity, I gave up on the Dolphins in utter frustration when they turned the ball over at like the 1 yard line. But good job pulling that one together.

Peyton this, Peyton that. Hey, did you see Tommy Brady is SI's Sportsman of the Year?

And did you watch Benny playing well - and in the snow? Spell Roethlisberger backwards without looking. Go!

Okay, really. That's it.

-Roxy

What?

So what's this I hear about Nomar possibly playing first base for the Yankees, Dear Rox? It's like the Infield of Dreams... maybe? Isn't Nomar a Red Sox wash out? I used to like Nomar, but that was when he was good. Ever since he left to the Cubs, he sort of disappeared. Let's see what happens. Maybe we'll get Millar instead!!! Oh, yeah, I said it, Millar!

I am so taking off tomorrow. I won't be back til Monday! I'm going to the wonderful world of Disney, well, close - Universal/Islands of Adv... And I also get a chance to visit my dad in Orlando. Can't wait.

Oh, yeah, how about the 13-o Colts? Once again, Peyton played a great game. Can't wait to see how everything plays out.
And those Dolphins. Wow, they've won three in a row, and one against a great team; the Chargers. Needless to say, I was chocked!

Off topic: Congrats to Wentworth Miller for his Golden Globe nomination for best actor in a drama series for Prison Break!!! Oh yeah! It's time you start watching this show, missy.

Not So Random Letdown

DEAR CRISS, I AM SO UPSET/SAD/CRAZY over the following:

1. My Kevin Millar was not offered arbitration. No more Kev. No more Cowboy Up. No more Born in the USA (I'll explain that one to you later.)

2. No more Mirabelli!! He's with the PADRES. Who's gonna catch Wakey? Me? Certainly not Varitek. He does the Irish jig out there trying to catch Wakey.

3. Billy Mueller!!!! With the DODGERS. What?!

4. Good-bye Renteria. It was a bizarre time, but best to him. Don't think that was the best fit for the old Sox. Oh well.

Of course, I really won't be super-duper sad until I hear where Millar ends up. I already miss him. Who am I gonna see at spring training? The Paw Sox? I'm not driving to see the Paw Sox. As for your Bernie, well, at least you have good news today.

When are the Sox gonna make the Rox smile again (like this picture)?
--Roxy

Photo: Boston.com

Random Information

Dear Rox -
It seems that the Yankees have offered arbitration to Bernie and I couldn't be happier.... I love Bernie, and for him to have, at least, a minor roll with the Yankees will be awesome. Let's see what happens....
All I remember about Olerud is him in a Mets uniform....
Damon still wants a 7-year contract, a no one wants to give it to him....
So much for Pierre going to the Yankees, he signed with the Cubs....
Are the Red Socks getting rid of Manny?.....

I'm running out of things, please help!

Oh, Olerud.

Well, Dear Criss, looks like Olerud is calling it a career. I think we can both agree he's a pretty serious team player and contributor. I like thinking of him as a member of the Red Sox, but you may have other thoughts/memories. Anyway, despite your long "I don't care about anything you say" post, I'd like to say sorry it took me a little bit to warm up to Oly. I mean, Millar is my first baseman, and I got a little nervous (still am). I read a feature story on "Oleroot" - the dietary supplement my sister calls him - a few months ago in The Boston Globe, and he is a really good person and family man. Anyway, best wishes to him and his nice fam.

And guess who woke up at the crack of dawn this weekend to get her spring training tickets (round one)? Yes, you know that already. An hour and a half to make it happen. Ft. Meyers, here my sister and I come!

-Roxy

Photo: AP, Michael Dwyer; YahooSports.com

Who cares?

I don't! I mean, hello?... Just let Minky keep it, after all, he did catch it. It's not like he stole it.
Enough of those Red Sucks. And Steve? Who's Steve? Just kidding. But I do feel the need to talk about Marino. He did a great job with the Dolphins, although he never won the big game, but s*** happens.
I appreciate Ben, Dear Rox, just not as much Peyton.
And my Knicks, well, what can I say? They haven't gptten their act together, but they need to soooon...
Any big trades happening in the Yanks or Sox nation???
All I know is that Jeter better stay in the shortstop position. Enough of the nonsense. I read Juan Pierre from the Marlins might play center for the Yanks. That would be awesome. He's young, fast and can hit... We don't need an old, injured player to take over Bernie's place. We need a young, energetic guy who can handle NY, and I think JP is the right guy. Yay!
-Criss

What's the Deal with The Ball, Minky?

I'm so sick of hearing about the feuding over The Ball. Stop the nonsense. They're taking Minky to court, Dear Criss. And the worse part is, I don't know whose side I'm on. Part of me thinks that after 86 years, after the historic achievements of the 2004 Sox, the ball should stay in Boston. But then the other part of me feels that Minky caught it and it's his momento. Who wouldn't want to keep that? I mean, he was a part of history with that last out. So, you see my predicament?

Marino, Marino, Marino. How about more Steve, Steve, Steve? I mean, just because we live in S. FL... No, but really, I'm sure that was pretty cool. And the Knicks? Oh my goodness. Listen, you can keep the Knicks and Peyton Manning. I can't believe you can't appreciate Big Ben Roethlisberger. I dunno why, I just am not into the whole Peyton craze. Sorry (not really).

-Roxy


Photo: Boston.com